Random Notes, July-August 2025

 The bad news is overwhelming:

+ I worked in public radio for a little over two years (2003-06) and I still volunteer for that same station every Saturday. Of all the stops in my radio journey, this one was the least dysfunctional. Additionally, as someone who didn't grow up with cable, PBS Kids was a reliable daytime TV option over the summer; in fact, "Square One TV" was my first exposure to sketch comedy. It was disappointing, but not surprising, that the Trump-led GOP slashed federal funding for both in late June. A lot of large-market PBS and public radio stations will be fine (for now) but I worry about smaller stations in red areas, especially where the majority of the programming is canned or syndicated. Conservatives will celebrate because of an alleged liberal bias, ignoring that public radio has music and news/talk formats. With the Corporation for Public Broadcasting shutting down in a few weeks, the support of viewers like you is vital beyond words. 

+ Then there's Stephen. I wasn't a regular viewer of the second incarnation of the Late Show from the get-go, but by late 2019 it was appointment TV. Supposedly it was a budget move --Stephen would do interviews on location, something his predecessor never did-- but it smacks of politics. It is possible to be #1 in late night *and* lose money, but I would pin that on the slow death of network TV. If I'm watching Colbert, my cat instinctually jumps on my lap and pins me down (photo for evidence). I don't have live TV at the moment, so I watch Colbert and Seth Meyers the day after on YouTube; besides, I'm usually in bed before 11 CST. 

+ The dominant news story this summer, however involves a convicted pedophile that died six years ago. President Trump has seemingly gone through all five stages of grief (anger, especially) as he navigates a long-simmering scandal involving his late, estranged friend. The release of Epstein's documents has become a liberal dog whistle mirroring conservatives' obsession with Hunter Biden's laptop, only except Epstein didn't play computer solitaire or Minesweeper. Trump has admitted there was a falling out, but some damage was done; the far reaches of MAGA are anti-pedophile, and even if Trump did not have relations with underage women, the connection to Epstein is still damning. 

+ I needed a respite from the stupidity and vindictiveness. My sister persuaded me to fly to Anaheim with her this weekend; she's going to Disneyland, I'm taking a mini road trip to San Bernardino for baseball. We're also meeting our cousin (a manager for Disney Resorts) at Downtown Disney. 

I wish I had some badinage or repartee, but this has been a slog of a summer. I hope you're all doing well.

(754)

An Open Letter to Stephen King from Santa Claus

(Context here)

Ho ho ho and happy summer all,

Greetings from the North Pole, where I'm already preparing for my busiest day, five months from now. I wanted to take a moment to make a rare non-winter, out of season statement to address some comments made on social media by a little boy in Maine named Stephen King. 

WHAT THE FUCK, ASSHOLE? Don't drag me into this shit. I bring joy to children worldwide, and I don't need the bad PR. I was only on Epstein's island making my annual worldly rounds. Ghislaine Maxwell is on the naughty list for other shit. Besides, Epstein didn't even celebrate Christmas.

Yes, Stephen, there is an Epstein list. The list exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Epstein list! It would be as dreary as if there were no author of "Carrie." 

Not believe in the Epstein list! You might as well not believe in murderous sewer clowns. You might see your government's Department of Justice fire prosecutors with connections to the investigation, but even if you did not see an Epstein list coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees the Epstein list, but that is no sign that there is no Epstein list.

Enough flowery Gilded Age prattle, though: you've always been a dick, Stephen. I wanted your feedback on a short story I was working on, and you said "it's just 'The Tommyknockers' with elves." Clive Barker would never accuse me of being derivative. You still got presents on Christmas Day, even when you were coked out of your gourd, directing "Maximum Overdrive." Fuck you! 

Sincerely, Jolly Old Saint Nick

PS: Before I incriminate myself further, I want to remind all the good boys and girls that Santa's little helpers all make a living wage with optional paid overtime, in sufficient working conditions, and (most pivotally) are all over 18. Santa's Workshop has no affiliation with the Amazon warehouse recently built near the North Pole. 

(753)

20 Years On: The Legacy of TV.com

June 1st, 2005 marked the soft launch of TV.com, the site where I built most of my internet infamy. I've talked about the site at length before (after all, that's where this blog started) but for newer readers I'll sum it up here:

In many ways, TV.com was an upgrade over TV Tome. There was a more sophisticated interface, and an opportunity for social interaction that ran parallel with the nascent Facebook. TV Tome was founded and run by one guy, who then delineated some responsibilities to two paid employees; CNet swooped in just as this trio was burning out and ready to give up. TV.com had a full-fledged staff of admins, lording over a hundred-plus volunteer editors chosen by meritocracy. I built a handful of friendships at TV Tome, but that increased seemingly tenfold when CNet took the reins. I've even dated people that had TV.com accounts. My generating of content, pieced together from reliable internet sources and old TV Guides, veered into the maniacal until even I started to flame out.

Alas, the site was mismanaged and it lost money; the admin was gradually reduced to a couple of people, and it lost even more revenue. Our fan-created, all volunteer IP was shifted to TV Guide (another CNet acquisition, albeit far more established) and the site was dead by early 2020. The relationships, however mostly remain. 

Besides this being the unofficial 20th anniversary of this blog, this September would've been TV Tome's 25th anniversary. TV.com is a fading memory, TV Tome all but forgotten. If you're reading this, thanks again for sticking around. 

Meanwhile... we're at war? Did Trump drop bombs on Iran without the approval of Congress or his Secretary of State? In a just world, this is the singular event that results in Democrats taking both houses in the 2026 midterms. If he didn't have so many enablers, this would be grounds for a third impeachment; alas, that would mean President JD Vance. Right now, only a handful of Democrats seem to be vocal in resistance. The empire keeps crumbling.

(752)

Through a Freshman's Eyes: "Superbad" Edition

Depending upon where you are in the United States, high school graduation was somewhere between the middle of last month and this week. Most of this year's graduates were (if you can stomach this) born between late 2006 and mid-2007. Keeping a tradition that started as a ripoff of Beloit College's old Mindset List, I try to offer a glimpse into the perspective of someone who was born my senior year at Illinois State. Take a deep breath and enjoy!

If you graduated high school this year...

...it has always been possible for a woman to be US Speaker of the House.

...Pluto has always been defined as a dwarf planet.

...you've never known a world without the iPhone, Apple TV, Hulu, SoundCloud, or Amazon Kindle. 

...you've never played with a Nintendo GameCube.

...Martin Scorsese's name has always been preceded by "Academy Award winner."

...you've always associated Seth Meyers with telling topical jokes, not sketch comedy.

...the Kardashian family have always had a TV show.

...people have always been debating the "Sopranos" finale.

...Britney Spears has always been associated with mental health issues and conservatorship.

...Michael Vick has always been associated with animal abuse.

...Barry Bonds has always been baseball's all-time home run king.

...Kevin Durant has always played in the NBA.

...Patrick Kane has always played in the NHL.

...Steve Irwin, Pat Corley, Ann Richards, Boz Burrell, Buck O'Neil, Carlo Acutis, Cory Lidle, Johnny Callison, Freddy Fender, Jane Wyatt, Sandy West, Joe Niekro, Red Auerbach, Johnny Sain, Ed Bradley, Milton Friedman, Bo Schembechler, Robert Altman, Anita O'Day, Emmett Kelly Jr, Jose Uribe, Peter Boyle, Lamar Hunt, Ahmet Ertegun, the son from "The Jeffersons," Joseph Barbera, James Brown, Gerald Ford, Darrent Williams, Harry Horse, Carlo Ponti, Alice Coltrane, Ron Carey, Art Buchwald, Bam Bam Bigelow, Denny Doherty, Vern Ruhle, Lorne "Gump" Worsley, Bob Carroll Jr, Barbaro, Sidney Sheldon, Molly Ivins, Anna Nicole Smith, Hank Bauer, Peggy Gilbert, Dennis Johnson, Lamar Lundy, John Inman, Brad Delp, Richard Jeni, Bowie Kuhn, Larry "Bud" Melman, Coach Eddie Robinson, Darryl Stingley, Johnny Hart, Barry Nelson, Roscoe Lee Browne, Kurt Vonnegut, Don Ho, Kitty Carlisle, Donald E. Stephens, David Halberstam, Boris Yeltsin, Jack Valenti, Tom Poston, Jerry Falwell, Charles Nelson Reilly, Clete Boyer, Bill France Jr, Don Herbert, Kurt Waldheim, Rod Beck, Chris Benoit, Liz Claiborne, Beverly Sills, Boots Randolph, Johnny Frigo, Charles Lane, Lady Bird Johnson, Tammy Faye Bakker, Mike Coolbaugh, Tom Snyder, Ingmar Bergman, Bill Walsh, Clarence "Tex" Walker, Merv Griffin, Brooke Astor, Phil "Scooter" Rizzuto, Max Roach, and Richard Jewell have always been dead.

Next time: my (proper) 20th anniversary post.

(751)

Witless for the Prosecution

In February, I received my first ever jury summons. In Illinois, you have to call a hotline confirming availability; I did that, and a few weeks later I received a second letter giving me a specific day and time to arrive at Dirksen Federal Courthouse in the Loop. I filled out an online questionnaire and called the hotline again. I arrived Monday morning, April 21st surrounded by coverage of Pope Francis' passing, but also surrounded by over a hundred other possible jurors. 

We filled out another questionnaire, watched two introductory videos, and after sitting around for an hour we were all escorted upstairs to a 17th floor courtroom. We were introduced to the judge and sat through the basic details of a federal trial. At 10:45, after the first 16 potential jurors were chosen for interview, the rest of us were told to come back in an hour. I had back to the second floor commons, where I had an outstanding cheeseburger for an early lunch. When I went back up to the 17th floor at 11:40, I was notified that the trial had been cancelled, and to call the hotline again after 5. 

Lo and behold, I was summoned again. I arrived before 8:30 that Tuesday, sat around for an hour (again), and watch the same two videos as before. It was a smaller group this time, maybe 30 of us. Just after 9:30, we were escorted out to the hallway, then notified that we weren't needed at all today, and told to call the hotline again. At 5 PM that night, I was told I wasn't needed anymore. So much for lives in the balance; at least I only missed half a day of work.

If anything of value came from this experience, now I know where to find a good cheeseburger in the Loop.

Other notes:

+ This lapsed Catholic is relieved by the election of Robert Cardinal Provost to Pope Leo XIV. American Catholicism is steadily pivoting harder to the right, and Leo is both a Chicagoan *and* a progressive in the vein of Francis I. It's also a sideways rebuke of Trumpism, following liberal victories in (wary) US ally nations like Canada and Australia. 

+ Where are those low gas prices?

+ With that said... this is my 750th blog entry. I stopped writing weekly in late 2012, but if I had the time and energy and kept it up, I'd be well past 1,000 by now. On top of that, next month marks 20 years of blogging, both here and on CNet. I've always had a modest number of regular readers, several of whom have come and gone, but I'm thankful regardless that you still check in. 

Next time: my annual "mindset list."

(750)

Random Notes, April 2025

Sorry for the delay, it's been a busy month. I apologize again for the radio silence:

+ President Trump falls in love with certain words. In his first term, it was "collusion" and "quid pro quo." Second time around, he sprinkles "tariff" in every other sentence as if he fully understands what that entails. On top of tanking the economy in real time, he's taxing allies and adversaries alike because they're "unfair" (another buzzword) and won't elaborate further. Then he took heat from within the GOP, his approval rating dipped, and Trump mostly backpedaled. This alleged freeze holds until early July, but who knows if this histrionic cycle continues.

+ The overreach is overflowing into other aspects of American life. A Maryland man was detained and sent to a maximum security facility in El Salvador for ambiguous reasons. Three children, one requiring medical attention, all technically anchor babies but US citizens regardless, were deported. This second non-consecutive term is only 100 days in, but I fear this won't be the cruelest thing this administration does.

+ The house was sold seven months, but my aunt's estate remains a headache. As the executor of the estate, I owe the state of Illinois $720 and the feds over $7,000. (My CPA said I can pay in installments.) This probably puts the kibosh on my summer travel plans. To my handful of regular readers, I'm open to summer job opportunities if you have leads.

Next Time: my jury duty experience.

(749)