I'm turning 35 on August 18th. I would probably be more excited, but it has been an oddly lonely summer. I typically have a flexible schedule during the warmer months, and I usually make some effort to meet up with old friends. This year, however it really hasn't panned out. A fair number of DMs on social media have been left unanswered, as have texts and the occasional email.
My fear is probably irrational, but I suppose that when people started whittling down their circle of close friends, I was among the first or second group to be phased out. I almost unilaterally get along with people, but in the vast majority of cases I've been an acquaintance or on the peripheral. While it is natural for friendships to phase out, and this sort of attrition is normal in your 30s, it is the close friendships of years past that I do mourn.
What am I attempting to express, however is hardly a cry for help. If anything, I'm in a wistful mood; my optimism about this sort of thing simply tends to waver. I mention my birthday because I genuinely enjoy when people leave wall posts on and around the 18th. For one day out of the year, I feel unequivocally embraced and appreciated. At some point on the 19th or 20th, that somewhat irrational feeling of isolation resets.
To everyone reading this, I've said it before and I'll say it again: thanks for riding along. I hope you stick around for awhile.
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