Depending upon where you are in the United States, high school graduation was somewhere between the middle of last month and this week. Most of this year's graduates were (if you can stomach this) born between late 2006 and mid-2007. Keeping a tradition that started as a ripoff of Beloit College's old Mindset List, I try to offer a glimpse into the perspective of someone who was born my senior year at Illinois State. Take a deep breath and enjoy!
If you graduated high school this year...
...it has always been possible for a woman to be US Speaker of the House.
...you've never known a world without the iPhone, Apple TV, Hulu, SoundCloud, or Amazon Kindle.
...you've never played with a Nintendo GameCube.
...Martin Scorsese's name has always been preceded by "Academy Award winner."
...you've always associated Seth Meyers with telling topical jokes, not sketch comedy.
...the Kardashian family have always had a TV show.
...people have always been debating the "Sopranos" finale.
...Britney Spears has always been associated with mental health issues and conservatorship.
...Michael Vick has always been associated with animal abuse.
...Barry Bonds has always been baseball's all-time home run king.
...Kevin Durant has always played in the NBA.
...Patrick Kane has always played in the NHL.
...Steve Irwin, Pat Corley, Ann Richards, Boz Burrell, Buck O'Neil, Carlo Acutis, Cory Lidle, Johnny Callison, Freddy Fender, Jane Wyatt, Sandy West, Joe Niekro, Red Auerbach, Johnny Sain, Ed Bradley, Milton Friedman, Bo Schembechler, Robert Altman, Anita O'Day, Emmett Kelly Jr, Jose Uribe, Peter Boyle, Lamar Hunt, Ahmet Ertegun, the son from "The Jeffersons," Joseph Barbera, James Brown, Gerald Ford, Darrent Williams, Harry Horse, Carlo Ponti, Alice Coltrane, Ron Carey, Art Buchwald, Bam Bam Bigelow, Denny Doherty, Vern Ruhle, Lorne "Gump" Worsley, Bob Carroll Jr, Barbaro, Sidney Sheldon, Molly Ivins, Anna Nicole Smith, Hank Bauer, Peggy Gilbert, Dennis Johnson, Lamar Lundy, John Inman, Brad Delp, Richard Jeni, Bowie Kuhn, Larry "Bud" Melman, Coach Eddie Robinson, Darryl Stingley, Johnny Hart, Barry Nelson, Roscoe Lee Browne, Kurt Vonnegut, Don Ho, Kitty Carlisle, Donald E. Stephens, David Halberstam, Boris Yeltsin, Jack Valenti, Tom Poston, Jerry Falwell, Charles Nelson Reilly, Clete Boyer, Bill France Jr, Don Herbert, Kurt Waldheim, Rod Beck, Chris Benoit, Liz Claiborne, Beverly Sills, Boots Randolph, Johnny Frigo, Charles Lane, Lady Bird Johnson, Tammy Faye Bakker, Mike Coolbaugh, Tom Snyder, Ingmar Bergman, Bill Walsh, Clarence "Tex" Walker, Merv Griffin, Brooke Astor, Phil "Scooter" Rizzuto, Max Roach, and Richard Jewell have always been dead.
Next time: my (proper) 20th anniversary post.
(751)
No comments:
Post a Comment