Writer's Blocked

 What's going on? I mean, besides all the dumb stuff? Plenty:

I'm still having battles with Meta over Stu News; Meta really likes to parse when it comes to promoting. There's an exemption for politics and civics, but it applies to candidates, non-profits, and action groups, and not comedy or satire. I've been able to promote content, but I can't use a sitting politician's name or mention specific political parties. Typing "T***p" or "B***n" dulls the edge, so to speak. This annoying crap has been going on for a few years.

Two weeks ago, however I found this new red flag. FB won't suggest Stu News to friends of friends anymore because of my content. I've been mistaken for a bot (here and IRL) before, I understand that. In nearly 13 years, those "other sensitive subjects" have become Stu News' bread and butter. I'm not interpreting this as censorship so much as AI-fueled gatekeeping. 

If this limits my page's reach long- or short-term, I'm at peace with that. I'll still be posting new jokes and fresh "reports" six days a week. That's where you come in, friend; Stu News has over 2,800 followers largely by word of mouth, and I hope that you continue to read and share the content I post. If you're weening yourself off FB, I'm also on Twitter/X, Threads, and BlueSky; just look up the #StuNews hashtag. I also set up a Patreon to help pay for some of that promotion overhead. What started as an opportunity to potentially land a comedy writing gig morphed into something else entirely, and I hope it's one of the reasons you're still on this flawed site.

Meanwhile, one of my best friends had a baby! Congrats to Dan and his wife on their son, born March 2nd. That also means Flower Shop Bangers is still, still on hiatus. If you're a comedy friend reading this, I'm still seeking out a collaborator; I had a couple projects in the last year that were dead-ends.

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Confessional Epilogue

In 2013 and 2017, I blogged about my fractious relationship with "Sandra." Even though she iced me out years ago, I attempted two or three times to reach out by email, the last time in Summer 2020. I thought the story was over until a recent development. 

A mutual high school acquaintance tipped me that Sandra was getting a divorce. I went to her Facebook --we're still friends, though we don't interact-- and noticed that any mention of her husband had disappeared. Then I went to her husband's FB and found what my confirmation: over a year ago, she started a Bumble account on the down low, met a guy and moved in with him. She essentially walked out on her two daughters and husband of almost nine years. 

I've never met Sandra's husband; they met in 2012, and he was babysitting when Sandra and I (among others) did dinner in July 2017. We've had one brief social media interaction. All he said was that Sandra posted a flowery response for shanking her marriage, but without a doubt, he was cucked. I heard from another mutual friend he has severe anxiety and wasn't handling this well. Without context, I hope he gets full custody of their two daughters.

To some extent, I'm not surprised. It took me a long time to realize Sandra's narcissism, but I knew her pattern of poor communication and acting on impulse. She didn't apologize for avoiding me in 2010, she simply justified why. When I thought we were going to reconnect in 2017, she was mostly avoidant all night. Perhaps my act of self-sabotage was, without reasoning mistakes, a blessing in disguise. I am unlikely to interact with Sandra or her estranged husband again, there's no need to. Weirdly, I feel almost validated in retrospect.

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Better Unread Than Dead

My New Year's resolutions in 2015 and 2020 were relatively similar: I wanted to make a conscious effort to reconnect with people I haven't seen or heard from recently. With 2020 being a wash for obvious reasons, I extended this vague goal into 2021. I have give or take 2,500 FB friends, so someone is naturally going to be left behind. For anyone that isn't on FB or largely skirks social media, it makes for a fun challenge. Having been on social media since the mid-2000s, and being in college when this unique interconnectivity was at its advent, there aren't that many people my age or younger that are "off the grid."

I often wonder about the people that don't answer their messages. The ignored texts, the overlooked emails. Do I have old contact info? Did I land in the spam folder? Admittedly, I used to take this sort of thing a lot harder. I still find it rude, but I have a better understanding of why someone might not reply; most often, they're too busy. By no means do I expect a reply within the hour; I'm perfectly happy with a short reply. Too often, I feel like I'm shooting an arrow through the air; where it lands? No idea where.

The weirdest feeling is when you figure out someone has blocked you on Facebook or Instagram or something without cause or explanation. I've run into that a few times; if I do have that alternate means, I typically write a "hello, how are things?" without directly addressing the snub. Usually, in those cases I don't get a reply. I'm not afraid of confrontation per se, but I'm not going to send an unprovoked "WTF" text either. I'm socially awkward, so misunderstandings can abound.

In any case, I hope they're doing well. I wouldn't reach out to just anyone.

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Random Notes, February 2017

Typically I'm not very political on social media. Then again, these are very unusual times. I still feel no inclination to support President Trump, and even though I refuse to normalize him, I admit that any chance of him being impeached or resigning from office is pretty slim. This first month in office has been fairly bizarre and at times unwatchable. Trump achieved that most elusive of brass rings in American society, and it seems like he's struggling to justify wanting (or keeping) that grand prize.

President Trump has already demonstrated that he's out of touch, and that his inner circle is more or less calling the shots. That press conference on February 16th was four weeks of chaos in a nutshell, and the Kellyanne Conway/Nordstrom flap demonstrated that his inner circle isn't necessarily on the same page, either. Nearly everyone in the Oval Office beehive is making up stuff as they go along, and only his most ardent supporters are still eating their honey.

Other notes:

+ Please read this excellent and moving essay from a Muslim woman who quit the Trump administration. Its an insider's take the chaos going down as well as a plea for sanity and tolerance.

+ Speaking of social media... since January 19th, I've gained 10 Facebook friends and lost nine. Evidently, a lot of people are deactivating their accounts; I would attribute this to something I might have said or done, but with one exception I've largely avoided political posts. (I save the topical hot takes for Stu News.) I used to be more vocal on my Facebook profile, though I'm more open about current events on Twitter.

+ Last year I achieved the goal of traveling more, and I anticipate continuing the pace in 2017. Next week, my girlfriend and I are driving to Bay City, MI (her childhood hometown) for a friend's 30th birthday party, and I'm heading back to the Omaha Improv Festival on Memorial Day Weekend. Depending upon finances, there might be more road trips in store later in the year.

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Off, Wisconsin!

As a native Illinoisan, it's difficult for me to give my neighbors in Wisconsin any credit or respect. It's a regional rivalry, plain and simple. From a political perspective, the "Cheddar Curtain" has historically been an incubator for nonpartistanship, competence, and honesty; Wisconsin stayed out of the limelight while bordering states were embarassed by the likes of Jesse Ventura, George Ryan, and Rod Blagojevich. It is neither a red state nor a blue state, but a gooey shade of purple. With mild trepidation, I'll admit that Wisconsin has a legislative method that I ardently envied... until now.

In 2010, Scott Walker was elected governor during the big Tea Party bum rush. A fiscal and social conservative, nearly every move Walker has made in 18 months in office has been under scrutiny. His eradication of collective bargaining rights for unions (exempting only police officers and firefighters) made national headlines. The labor guys felt blindsided, but Walker justified the move as a budget cut in the face of a deficit. Unions aside, some argue that the cuts were also a cynical manuever to emasculate a deep-pocketed Democratic constituency. This would be mere partisan chess if not for a) Walker threatening to sic the National Guard upon his critics and b) all of the union scuffling happened in his first six weeks in office. So much for a strong first impression.

Of course, that's not the only nitpick against the Walker administration. His promise to add 250,000 jobs to the Badger State hasn't panned out, and the nonpartisan Tax Foundation determined that Wisconsin has a less business-friendly tax climate than before Walker took office. This past weekend, Walker nonchalantly signed three bills that impede a woman's right to choose, denied hospital visitation rights for same-sex couples, and repealed the state Equal Pay Enforcement Act. Walker quietly signed off on Good Friday, thinking his critics wouldn't pay attention on a religious holiday. He guessed wrong.

With their agenda all but transparent, Walker and Lt. Governor Rebecca Kleefisch are now subject to the first recall election in state history; the primary is next month, the election in early June. The state that begat Joseph McCarthy more than six decades ago is afraid of another bullying activist, and for good reason. Some will judge the state capital of Madison as a liberal enclave and Milwaukee's history of electing Socialist mayors (three total, none since 1960) but any left-leaning activism is limited to those two cities only. Wisconsin is centrist at its core, one of the last sectors of the country where the government actually gets work done, and democracy in its purist form is at stake.

Other notes:

+ Down goes Rick Santorum. As polarizing as he and his campaign might have been, and the cards stacked ever higher for Mitt Romney, he didn't want to fight futilely for his own home state. Ultimately, I suppose it came down to the well-being of his young daughter, too. At least Santorum left the race with his dignity intact.

+ Improv Update: over the weekend, my independent team The War Room made our unofficial debut. Even though we'd performed before on the Chicago "barprov" circuit, this was the first time we had demonstrated our form to an audience. This was several months in the making; my friend Brandon had formed the group, and I had never done genre-specific improv before. We play again on the 14th, so wish us luck!

+ Over on Facebook, I created an internet meme-cum-unofficial holiday. Follow this link to spread the word about "Mothra Day."

Random Notes, April 2011

As you probably guessed, this week's missive is a tad late. In fact, in nearly six years this is the latest I've ever posted a Weekly Update. Long story short, I was spending long hours training for a sales/marketing position that ultimately didn't work out. Regardless, I remain optimistic and will continue my job search with my head held high. With that said, let me drop off some random notes:

+ In some ways, President Obama dodged a bullet last weekend. In other ways, he shot himself in the foot. I'm relieved that we won't be facing a government shutdown, but the compromise that party leaders agreed upon late Friday night won't satisfy too many Americans. Some cuts, like education and elderly care were sadly inevitable, but others clearly demonstrated the seemingly impenitrible stranglehold of lobbyists and special interest groups. If the majority of our elected officials had actual jobs --or possessed any real-world skill besides governing-- they would've been fired now. The partisan cease fire in the wake of Gabby Giffords' shooting was fleeting; the ideological dagger eyes are just as pointed as they were before the election. The bipartisan period of mourning, one of mutual yet begrudging respect, was just that-- a period.

+ On that note, whatever became of the Tea Party radicals that took a battering ram to the status quo last year? Chances are, the mavericks that were elected to the House in November are too preoccupied trying to stay in office; it's fairly common for rookie representatives to spend nearly their entire two-year term fighting off challengers for a congressional seat they won mere months ago. However, the two or three that were present and vocal during the debates griped that there weren't enough cuts on government spending (naturally). As literal and pure as they may be, the Tea Partiers will eventually come to the same conclusion that Newt Gingrich arrived at in 1996: a government that spends no money whatever can neither govern nor function.

+ Another spring, another fantasy baseball rollout. So far, my results are no different than the past three years: my TV.com team is middling while my other team thrives. I drafted Mike Aviles on both teams; after a sizzing opening day he's been batting .060, so I dropped him for Hideki Kuroda and Alberto Callapso. Now I need to figure out what to do with an injured Ryan Zimmerman...

+ Finally, I'd like to address a bizarre incident that occured on Facebook last week. For those of you that are friends with me outside of this site, I'm somewhat notorious for writing witty, facetious status updates. Sometimes my original material clicks, sometimes it doesn't, it's all trial and error. On Tuesday the 5th, I jokingly announced that I had won the prestigious Red Smith Sports Journalism Award for an article I wrote titled "Wilson vs. Blaylock: History's Greatest Mookie?" Instead of getting the usual "John Smith likes this" or "LOL" comment, I received several notes congratulating me on the honor. Apparently, my wit was too dry for its own good; my friends and acquaintances didn't realize that a) the Red Smith is like the Pulitizer for sportswriting and almost as lucrative, and b) I'm just your average free-lance writer/blogger, not a scribe for Sports Illustrated or anything of the such. Eventually I had to clarify my failed joke, and no one felt betrayed, but for my own personal amusement I actually will write a blog spot next week comparing and contrasting the two Mookies. This article will be either my creative pinnacle or a stunning failure, and anyone that's interested will have a front row seat.

GO ROYALS!!!

An Imperfect Ten

I woke up early Friday morning to some very startling news. My radio alarm is set on a classic rock station, and the DJ and the news-reader were discussing the passing of Ron Santo at length. I knew that Santo had a history of health problems, including two boughts with cancer and a lifelong struggle with diabetes, but I was still shocked.

As a Chicagoan, it's very difficult to say anything bad about Ron Santo and get away with it, and his passing has only reinforced the defense shields. The Cubs have an almost nationalized fan base, and not surprisingly my home city is their apparent Mecca. On the north side of the city, the Cubs are a religion --a cult in the most literal sense-- and Wrigley Field is their Hagia Sophia. Good luck finding a White Sox cap within a one-block radius of the stadium, which is almost nothing but sports bars and fan boutiques. In spite of that even Sox fans are sitting shiva, and the most cynical Cubbie-haters are keeping their mouths shut or carefully choosing their words... myself included.

For the longest time, I waffled on Ronnie's Cooperstown credentials. Without being too blunt, a career line of 342/1,331/.277 over 15 seasons is pretty good but not good enough. The fact of the matter is, what exactly puts Santo on the same level as Mike Schmidt, George Brett, Brooks Robinson, or Eddie Mathews? If all-around nice guys with decent power stats made the Hall of Fame, Dale Murphy would be in by now. If players that dominated their position for one decade but didn't do much else afterward were inducted, so would Dwight Evans. A remarkable start followed by a string of injuries? Don Mattingly. At least five Gold Gloves? Jim Kaat and Dave Concepcion. Harold Baines has nearly 300 more career ribbies, but he'll be lucky if the Veterans' Committee votes him in. Yes, you could argue that if you put all of those factors together Santo should be a lock for the Hall of Fame, but that's not what it's all about. Being above-average at a wide variety of things and excelling at nothing does not merit enshrinement. That'd be like if a career B+ student were chosen for National Honor Society.

The iO Theater is one half-block south of Wrigley on Clark Street, so I typically walk past the stadium about two or three times a week. I was in city late Saturday night for a show, and two separate but equal tributes had mushroomed on the stadium premises. The first and most visible was along the home plate entrance under the red "Friendly Confines" sign, inside and along the locks and barricades. The second was on the Walk of Fame along the first base side, where each team HOFer has their name engraved into Addison Ave. sidewalk. There were photos, flowers, letters-- pretty much everything you can think of except baseball cards. The outpouring of support to Santo's family and the Cubs' organization was remarkable. This tribute could curb the most tactless soul from saying anything disrespectful about the deceased, it was that resonating. However, I'm still not convinced that he should be enshrined --a sizable albeit quiet minority-- though right now stating such a strong opinion makes me feel a tad squeamish.

Other notes:

+ I finally found a job... for now. I interviewed with a temp agency in early August, and just before Thanksgiving they recommended me for an interview with a local catering company. I aced the sitdown and now I work 35+ hours a week in a calling center. I'm only officially employed with them through New Year's, but hopefully this parlays into something more substantial.

+ My TV.com fantasy football team is 5-8, and even though I've won four of my last five matchups, I'm nowhere near playoff contention and the window has all but shut. My other team is 3-10 and couldn't even beat our resident last-place roster in Week 13. As most of you know, I'm still doing decent in NFL Pick 'Um, though.

+ Late last week, I noticed that several of my Facebook friends had changed their profile photos to beloved childhood cartoon characters for the purpose of raising child abuse awareness. In solidarity, I changed mine to "Mathman" from Square One TV. On Sunday afternoon, I heard through the gravepine that the organization that promoted the stunt had ties to NAMBLA and was conspiring to hack the accounts of preteen Facebookers. Oops.

Random Notes, July 2009

+ Regardless of whether or not she's running for president in three years, wouldn't it have made sense for Gov. Sarah Palin to finish out her term? Why did she choose the 3rd of July to declare her independence from Alaska? Though the media (mainstream and otherwise) has downplayed the numerous ethics complaints that she's received from her political opponents since last November, wouldn't it have made sense to address these charges and not spend 90% of her time touring the lower 48? Granted, a couple of the accusations do sound fishy, but that's beside the point; in the wake of becoming a national candidate last year, Palin simply hasn't been doing her job and the Alaska politicos turned their backs on her. Her resignation address, unfocused and hasty as it might have been, left more questions than answers; it felt like an overly subtle --and very premature-- announcement for her presidential candidacy. It's one thing to be a maverick, it's another to run away from your problems.

+ Meanwhile, this week I'm making my second serious foray into finding an apartment. I made my first attempt to break out on my own near the end of my stint at Illinois State; for all the amazing deals I found in Normal ($400/m including gas, water and electric!) I was low on money and I didn't have a job, so I had no choice but to move back home. Now that I have a part-time gig and a little bit of a nest egg, I'm making my second attempt to move out of my parents' house. Stay tuned...

+ While I'm happy (though far from surprised) that Zach Greinke was selected for the American League All-Star Team, I was somewhat disappointed that Alberto Callaspo (5/31/.301) and perennial bridesmaid David DeJesus (currently leading the AL with 6 triples) weren't considered for that "32nd man" ballot. Chone Figgins and his one home run gets a reprieve but not Big Al?

+ This TV.com/Facebook crossover might take some getting used to, especially now that my ugly mug is on display. I'm still deciding if I'll bring back my Royals avatar...

+ Last Saturday was the first broadcast of "Those Were The Days" with Steve Darnall as host (see WU #209), and to be honest with you, I thought the public's reaction was way, way over the top. I can understand if there were going to be fireworks, but shutting down the banks and all federal buildings? Parades in nearly every town in the country? You'd think it was a national holiday or something... ;)