Wednesday, March 25, 2026

30 Teams, 30 Haiku: My 2026 Baseball Preview





Yes, I know the Giants-Yankees game on Netflix was Wednesday night. For most baseball enthusiasts, the real Opening Day is Thursday, and as always I come prepared with 510 syllables of prognostication. (Asterisks note wild cards)


AL EAST

1. Yankees: Bevy of pitching/prospects; now back home, will we/watch Judge choke again?

2. Blue Jays*: Even without Bo/new winning culture accrues/with the exchange rate.

3. Red Sox: Haphazard roster/oddly built; give Breslow a/Lego set, pronto!

4. Orioles: Too many prospects/rushed up; new bats compensate/for lack of an ace.

5. Rays: Too good for last; rash/of injuries gives deep farm/system a long look.



AL CENTRAL

1. Tigers: Justin's victory/lap hopes to curb another/September collapse.

2. Royals*: Jac, one of a kind/Playoff return in the cards/with Ragans bounce-back.

3. Guardians: Status quo is not/enough; can grit and moxie/hide lack of power?

4. Twins: Fire sale, Buxton/remains; these pesky unknowns/might play spoiler.

5. White Sox: Fun, young energy/party like it's 99/...losses, minimum.



AL WEST

1. Mariners: No sea legs here; tight/young core floats way beyond this/ho-hum division.

2. Astros*: Formidable bats/...on paper; Hunter Brown will/fish for run support.

3. Rangers: Too injury-prone/to predict; Langford, lone star/to play every day.

4. Athletics: Feisty young bats rake/but with soft arms, 85/high-scoring losses.

5. Angels: Yikes! Manoah and/Greyson are their aces? Trout/further goes to waste.



NL EAST

1. Mets: Stearns' shake-up must pay/off late in the year; prospects/won't be Benge-warmers.

2. Phillies*: New Wheeze Kids? Aging/core still has fight; Bryson Stott/due for a breakthrough.

3. Braves*: Dark horse, if healthy/a full year of Acuna/is wishful thinking.

4. Marlins: Infield defense, sole/saving grace; Morel at first/a curious move.

5. Nationals: Youth is served, on and/off the field; middle relief/will get a workout.



NL CENTRAL

1. Cubs: Bregman doesn't miss/the playoffs; deep roster will/ensure streak goes on.

2. Brewers: Low-budget wonders/elite bullpen's ground ball rate/is a saving grace.

3. Reds: Over .500/if young bats support Suarez/and Greene is healthy.

4. Pirates: Konnor at short, long/on potential; can new bats/placate wary Skenes?

5. Cardinals: Whether Wetherholt/produces, Redbird rebuild/is now in full swing.



NL WEST

1. Dodgers: Sets cash ablaze like/a Socal wildfire/shrewd anti-heroes.

2. Padres*: A healthy Merrill/and nasty bullpen enough/to beat LA? Eh...

3. Giants: Vitello, the old/college try; "huge" risks must pay/off at Oracle.

4. D-Backs: Ketel, not traded/another playoff near-miss/looms if pitching wilts.

5. Rockies: Purple punching bag/Goodman anchors bad lineup/and worse rotation.




AL MVP: Cal Raleigh, Mariners

NL MVP: Shohei Ohtani, Dodgers

AL Cy Young: Tarik Skubal, Tigers

NL Cy Young: Paul Skenes, Pirates

AL ROY: Kevin McGonigle, Tigers

NL ROY: Nolan McLean, Mets

First Manager Fired: Mark Kotsay, A's

2026 World Series: Dodgers over Tigers in 5


Thoughts?

(766)


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