Less Than Sterling

When new NBA commissioner Adam Silver announced that Los Angeles Clippers owner Donald Sterling was banned from the league, I took pause. I spent a good 30 minutes wondering if the punishment --banishment, the forced sale of his team, plus a $2.5 million fine-- was enough or too far. In some scenario, it might have made sense to hit Sterling where it hurts him most-- right in the wallet. In the wake of a scandal that affected and aggravated nearly every corner and crevice of professional basketball, and triggering a loaded first amendment debate, I ultimately believe the punishment fits the misdeed.

It was widely known in most social circles that Donald Sterling is a bigot. The comments that were recorded and released last week brought years of rumors and heresy to the surface.  A 2009 article in ESPN magazine focused on his notoriously abrasive personality, but only casually mentioned his testy, sometimes acrimonious relationships with African-American employees. Sterling was self-made, solecistic as well as solipsistic, and he didn't care what others thought of him. For his growing list of adversaries, however his dismissal from any and all NBA operations is a godsend.

The heft of the Sterling situation doesn't begin to rationalize the stupidity of his remarks. In a organization like the Clippers where over half of the payroll is black, and in a sports league where an overwhelming number of players, coaches, and executives are African-American, there is absolutely no place for Sterling's mindset. Even in the privacy of his mistress' boudoir, there was no rationale for his comments. Naming specific LA sports figures --NBA great Magic Johnson, Dodgers All-Star Matt Kemp-- only served to salt wounds. To not apologize or clarify his remarks firsthand, but rather hide behind an army of lawyers, reeks of cowardice. From that perspective, a lifetime ban makes perfect sense. People will not forget this, nor forgive Sterling in a prompt manner.

I suppose what startled me most about Silver's decision was how swift and thorough it was. He took the reins from David Stern less than three months ago, and this was the first major challenge (and decision) of his brief regime. I half-expected and feared weeks of doddering "investigations" and bluster, but Silver promptly reacted with dynamism and class. This wasn't a time to dwell, but a time for unity, and that the National Basketball Association should walk this off with dignity intact. The poison has been removed, Silver implied, and we should move on.  If only Adam Silver was representing us in Washington...

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Random Notes, April 2014

A few scattered thoughts:

+ Was Stephen Colbert the right pick? He was arguably the best available. Was Colbert the only pick, as Les Moonves suggested late last week? That depends on how you define "only." With all due respect to Colbert, Comedy Central probably thought he was marginally more expendable than Jon Stewart; if "The Daily Show" host is the Kobe of the network's late night lineup, than Colbert was Shaq. E! probably felt the same way about Chelsea Handler, and a plethora of other big names in the rumor mill simply didn't want the job. With that said, David Letterman turned the Late Show into the second-most lucrative position in late night TV, and I wish Colbert nothing but the best when he takes the reigns in mid-2015.

+ Speaking of late night, this past weekend I caught in two lengthy discussions about the current state of SNL. This has been a transitional year for the show, with eleven cast additions in two years and only three or four of them making any impact. It's been an awkward season, but surprisingly not terrible; underneath the clashing styles and cast overpopulation have been some funny sketches and overall solid episodes. All I can say, give this cast more time to grow. Nothing about SNL was ever built in a day.

+ I was beginning to think November might be a big victory of the GOP. Then something stupid like this happens, people raise a stink, and we have a real race again. Just like 2012, women might be an X-factor in the vote.

+ My father's side of the family used to live in Overland Park, KS, near Santa Fe Road and 83rd. My thoughts and prayers to the victims of Sunday's Jewish Center shooting.

Next Week: the second installment of "Seasons of Love."

Late and Lamented

Most people at TV.com know me as "the late night guy." If I wasn't editing a particular show, I had contributed at some point. Though editing the SNL episode guide earned me most of my notoriety, I put more time and energy into the Late Night and Late Show with David Letterman. Where SNL merited more discussion, Letterman had the greater workload. With twenty-odd shows a year, SNL didn't need the near-constant cultivation that LNDL and LSDL needed. Where one show was churning out 190 to 200 new broadcasts a year the older, defunct series was a neverending work in progress. Sometime next year, that aspect of my TV.com career might draw to a close.

I was surprised by David Letterman's announcement that he will retire in mid-2015, but I wasn't necessarily shocked. Rumors of Dave retiring has been floating around for well over a decade. His trademark sarcasm and occasional grumpiness was morphing into crusty old age. The tone of the Late Show had grown both claustrophobic and agoraphobic; Letterman could barely feign interest in his guests half the time, and he was reluctant to participate in remotes or anything outside the cocoon of the Ed Sullivan Theater, walking distance from the hustle and bustle of Times Square.

To call Letterman influential is almost redundant. During his 14 years at NBC --six months as a daytime talk show host, 11 1/2 years hosting Late Night, and occasionally filling in for Johnny Carson in between-- he began a miniature comedy revolution. It wasn't funny in the winking, set-up/punchline sort of way; it could be eclectic, abstract, uncomfortable or all three.  The franchise that is now Late Night was a risk of sorts; Letterman was given the thankless task of replacing Tom Snyder, following an awkward fallout with the Peacock. (Sound familiar?) What was initially a low-rent, straight-ahead chatfest quickly became the strangest hour on network television.

When Dave bolted for CBS in 1993, the experimentation of Late Night gave way to Dave's most under-appreciated talent, his ability to interview (and sometimes interrogate) a guest. Case in point: if Jay Leno was inclined to ask Paris Hilton about her perfume, Dave felt more compelled to ask the socialite about her stint in prison. And that actually happened. And maybe 20% of the time, Dave apologized for taking things too far. If Leno often conceded his spotlight to an A-list movie star, Letterman's show was unquestionably about Letterman. He was seldom interested in pandering or kissing ass.

Then there's the records. When all is said and done, Letterman will retire as the longest-serving late night talk show host ever (33 years and change) and most episodes (nearly 6,000 between NBC and CBS). Where Ed Sullivan hosted his show from his eponymous theater for 18 years, Letterman called "The Ed" home for 22. Just about every current late night talk show host has tipped their hat to Dave in the past few days, and the accolades spanned from "The Simpsons" to frequent Late Show guest Keith Olbermann.  Even though the Letterman-Leno feud is over, the Ali to Dave's Frazier has kept mum.

After all these years, I will admit that maintaining the Late Night and Late Show episode guides has been a losing, almost Sisyphean battle. With the new restrictions to TV.com editor guidelines, I would have to get special clearance to finish both guides the way I and my predecessor Alan Brewster set out to build over a decade ago. Don Giller and David Yoder, arguably Letterman's biggest fans as well as the comedian's unofficial historians, are both racing to finish an encyclopedia of all things Dave. Letterman's fans formed an online community not unlike a cult sci-fi show, and with the end anywhere between a year and 18 months away, we could be on the verge of a schism or just quietly going our seperate ways. I'm not leaving TV.com --not now, though I've been tempted-- but pretty soon my incentive to socialize and submit information there could dwindle significantly.

I'll miss you, Dave.

30 Teams, 30 Haiku: My 2014 Baseball Preview

The crack of the bat, the smell of the grass, and the neat assembling of 17 syllables to describe each MLB team's 2014 forecast. Yes ladies and germs, for the fourth year in a row please enjoy some baseball haiku. Granted, the Dodgers and Diamondbacks played their first game over a week ago, but for 28 other clubs Day One is still ahead. Feel free to disagree with poetic license in the comments section below:

(asterisks note wild cards)

AL EAST

1. Red Sox. This Lazarus act/has a tough act to follow/can't slump at Fenway.

2. Yankees*. Big spenders again/strong, but nowhere near elite/as old legs buckle.

3. Rays. If the Price is right/these overachievers will/sting the East again.

4. Orioles. This deep division/the margin of error here/is close to zero.

5. Blue Jays. Any improvements?/not the pitching, though the bats/have power to spare.

AL CENTRAL

1. Tigers. Heavily favored/despite no chemistry; they're/tops in a weak bunch.

2. Royals*. Three decades without/glory; the schneid ends if the/pitching can hold up.

3. Indians. Santana to third/seems like a logical move/but who's the shortstop?

4. Twins. Minor improvements/does not a contender make/the youth must grow up.

5. White Sox. Jose Abreu/blue-chip Cuban sandwiched in/a full youth movement.

AL WEST

1. Athletics. Gray weather forecast/A's fans expect Sonny skies/and playoff glory.

2. Rangers. The one Washington/that gets anything done is/now on the hot seat.

3. Angels. Underacheivers/hardly anyone earns their/paychecks except Trout.

4. Mariners. So they have Cano/and a switch-hitter surplus/they're not legit yet.

5. Astros. Worst is over, but/when Scott Feldman is your ace/dim expectations.

NL EAST

1. Nationals. First by happenstance/after '12 hangover, Nats/get pesky again.

2. Braves*. Mourn the rotation/if you want; their bats will give/Atlanta some hope.

3. Phillies. Pretend contenders/a team without direction/overhaul, A-SAP!

4. Mets. Some optimism/in Queens; the question is, do/they have the Wright stuff?

5. Marlins. Room for improvement/these raw youngsters might surprise/but they're years away.

NL CENTRAL

1. Cardinals. A strange dilemma/they have too many good arms/and too little time.

2. Pirates*. Feisty, resurgent/Roger is jolly again/Wild Card beckons.

3. Reds. Billy Hamilton/thief extrodinaire, young gun/high expectations.

4. Brewers. Ryan had fake brawn/Hebrew Hammer, nailed again/blemishes young squad.

5. Cubs. "Wait until next year"/always applies to Wrigley/sleeper in '15?

NL WEST

1. Dodgers. Already quite good/but if HanRam is healthy/they're unstoppable.

2. Giants. Health is crucial here/if San Fran wants to contend/in the wild West.

3. D-Backs. Many injuries/Corbin, B-Mac, Arroyo/so don't expect much.

4. Padres. With a stealth infield/Friars won't need miracles/to chase .500.

5. Rockies. No Chacin, no arms/plus burly offense equals/high scoring train wrecks.

NL Rookie of the Year: Billy Hamilton, Reds

AL Rookie of the Year: Nick Castellanos, Tigers

NL Cy Young: Clayton Kershaw, Dodgers

AL Cy Young: Felix Hernandez, Mariners

NL MVP: Andrew McCutchen, Pirates

AL MVP: Mike Trout, Angels

First Manager Fired: Mike Scioscia, Angels

2014 World Series: Los Angeles over Boston in 7

A Non-Illinoisan's Guide to the 2014 Illinois Primary (Written by an Illinoisan)

This Tuesday is the Illinois primary, that biennial exercise of democracy --er, vote-- that reminds us of the sorry state of gubernatorial politics in the Land of Lincoln. Here's a quick breakdown:

Governor: To the disappointment of some state Democrats, Pat Quinn should cruise through his party's nomination --his fourth straight on the gubernatorial ticket-- aspiring for a second full term as Illinois' top official. What was expected to be a wide-open race for this vulnerable incumbent was all but settled by last September. Attorney General Lisa Madigan was forced to bow out because of a potential scandal involving her father, State Speaker of the House Michael Madigan. Former White House Chief of Staff Bill Daley (son of Richard J, brother of Richard M) made a halfhearted sprint before quitting for personal reasons. Anti-violence activist Tio Hardiman, Quinn's sole remaining competitor, was never a factor in the race.

The GOP race is not as crowded as 2010's logjam --seven candidates in the running, with Bill Brady winning by less than 200 votes-- but there's a few familiar faces. The brash, polarizing Brady is running a second time against Bruce Rauner (a millionaire political novice), Kirk Dillard (a state senator and perennial bridesmaid), and state treasurer Dan Rutherford. Also unlike 2010, where a cluster of candidates from the same geographical area cancelled each other out, the four GOP hopefuls represent disparate parts of the state: Rauner is a Chicago native, Brady from Bloomington-Normal, Dillard from the west suburbs of Chicago, and Rutherford from small-town Pontiac. Recent polls suggest that Rauner will edge out Dillard to face the doddering Quinn.

U.S. Senate: Three-term incumbent and DC power-broker Dick Durbin is not facing any serious competition for the Democratic nomination. For the first time, however reelection is no sure thing; growing dissatisfaction by moderates and centrists toward the Obama administration will result in a tight race, regardless of who wins the GOP nomination.

On the Republican side, dairy magnate Jim Oberweis is by far the most recognizable name on the ballot. Also known as a politically active investment manager, Oberweis had lost five state elections at various levels before finally winning a Illinois Senate seat in 2012. Polls suggest that the fractured Illinois GOP will likely tilt toward Oberweis, as rival Doug Truax is in third place behind "undecided." In spite of endorsements from former Rep. Newt Gingrich and the Chicago Tribune, Truax's first run for public office will likely falter to Oberweis' deep coffers.

Congress: All 18 of Illinois' seats in the House of Representatives are on the ballot (duh) and though there are a few close races here and there, the state in general is likely to keep leaning Democrat. In the 13th District, GOP incumbent Rodney Davis is facing little opposition from challenger Erika Harold, though he might face a close race against Democratic frontrunner Ann Callis. The recently rearranged 17th District pits incumbent Democrat Cheri Bustos against her predecessor and 2012 opponent, Republican Bobby Schilling. Even if the House as a whole keeps leaning toward the right, the Land of Lincoln will help buffer a potential GOP blowout.

In spite of my cynical words, I encourage anyone reading this to please vote in your local primary this year, and most crucially in the midterm election this November. Even when the White House isn't at stake, there's a lot of issues on the docket and the future of American democracy is constantly shifting. Don't wait until the next presidential election to make your voice heard.

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Kobe Beef

This week, ESPN magazine published "The Conspiracy Issue," the latest themed issue they've rolled out since the cable network's publishing branch overhauled their format three years ago. It's one of my favorite magazines to read --I hardly bother with Sports Illustrated anymore-- and the theme issues can be quite fascinating. I read ESPN mag cover to cover, and while I was mostly enlightened by stories about frozen envelopes and point shaving I felt that the editors made one glaring omission.

I am absolutely, positively convinced that Kobe Bryant is a rapist. Everything about the case reeks of conspiracy; there was plenty of evidence to convict the NBA star, then the alleged assault victim changed her tune. With respect to the accuser, we still don't know the identity of Bryant's victim. Unlike Samantha Gailey, the 8th grader whose rape forced movie director Roman Polanski to flee the US, there was never a big reveal or a follow-up by the media. Just a counter-accusation of schizophrenia, than she disappeared into the ether. It's one thing to acknowledge and respect the privacy of a woman who was sexually assaulted, but another if this young woman lied. Regardless of age, that would be perjury.

It was almost as if the NBA wanted to silence her. Keep in mind where David Stern's league was in 2003: attendance was down, major market teams in Chicago and New York were also-rans, Michael Jordan had finally retired for good, "next" players like Vince Carter and Allen Iverson were already starting to fade, Lebron James and Dwayne Wade hasn't played a minute of pro ball yet.  Kobe was the best thing happening in the NBA at the time, and to see Stern's meal ticket go to prison for 8 to 10 years would have devastated the league. Somehow, Stern got his way.

Basketball has always been my #4 sport; I follow baseball, football, and hockey with a tad more ardor. The Kobe Bryant rape case essentially bound the NBA to fourth on my mental priority list. People can hate on Lebron or Derrick Rose all they want, but I can't bring myself to ever support or root for Kobe. Let the NBA and the mainstream media sweep it all under the rug, but nearly 11 years later the stench of conspiracy still lingers.

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